Getting To ‘YES’

me in the centre of the back row
“photo by N-Dimensions photography”

Getting out of our own way and making a decision seems as if it should be a straightforward, simple exercise in our lives as we are called upon to do this daily. But what I have come to discover is that we all ‘dance’ with decision making in our own ways. On my prior blog post I was asked what my thought process was in getting to ‘YES’ to sing with the Burstin with Broadway Choir.

I had made the fundamental decision to say yes as I had sought out this particular choir and put my name on the wait list for 5 months. However, when I got the call saying there was a spot in the alto section, but I must let them know within 48 hours, I could feel my heart begin to pound!

The weight of making the ‘right decision’ began to mount. We don’t ever make a decision hoping that it will be a bad one. The overarching pressure of making a ‘good decision’ weighed on me: Is now the right time? Is the alto section the right section for me? Do I have time for choir in my schedule? So I sat myself down with a coffee, and revisited the scope of what saying ‘YES’ meant to this particular decision. How I finally got to ‘YES’ was to give myself permission to quit/leave/drop-out if necessary.

The concept of quitting anything in my life has been a challenging place for me, until I began to realize it was merely say ‘YES’ to me in another way. Know that whether you say ‘YES’ or ‘NO’, the key is that the decision is in keeping with where you want to go … and periodically, it is okay to change your decision.

Life Coaching with Ruth
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  1. Getting To ‘YES’

    Thanks Ruth, this post struck a chord with me (pardon the pun)… in that I remember feeling trapped in university way back in my 20s. It was at this point, in the depths of depression that I said to myself, “hey, if I hate school that much… then I should leave”. In that moment I realized not only did I not “HATE” school as much as I thought, but that I resented feeling trapped. Once I took out the aspect of feeling trapped and realized I'd made a choice that I could change at any point. I decided that if I ever felt trapped in my life I would know that I could change my life at any moment… this was quite a revelation. Sometimes saying “yes” to something is far more difficult than saying “NO” simply because saying “Yes” means that you are not a victim in the situation but rather an active participant.

  2. Getting To ‘YES’

    I love that you said “Yes” to sing in the choir. I think you are awesome! I experienced the same type of “yes” situation when I was asked to teach music at a local charter school eight years ago. It had been several years since I had sung and played the violin. I chose to say “yes” to that opportunity, and even though I no longer teach there, I have kept on singing and playing my violin, filling my life with one of the things that has always brought me great joy, MUSIC!

  3. Getting To ‘YES’

    Hi Laina,
    the thing that was an even more delightful suprise when I walked into the first rehearsal was that the accompainist was my piano teacher from high school whom I hadn't seen in 30 years … talk about a flood of memories! The magic of music is truly a blessing on all levels
    cheers Ruth

  4. Getting To ‘YES’

    Thank you for writing this. My first thought was about how that 5 month period between initially making the decision and finally being faced with the opportunity to act on that decsion is more than enough time to torture oneself in the process of changing the initial decision, or questioning it, or even talking oneself out of it.

    But then when you add in the part about the decision being in keeping with where you want to go, I am reassured because keeping that underlying focus will definitely help when the churning of the initial decision starts to happen. This is great!! 🙂

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